COCONUT WATER

It's all the rage, allegedly. Yet another "water-like" beverage that has only slightly more benefits than drinking actual water. Have you tried this ... stuff? 

I have, and I won't spend much time discussing it. It tastes like something your dentist would make you rinse with just before oral surgery. Milky, dense and "warm," even when the package is ice cold, which is just weird. After a particularly long bike ride on Governor's Island recently, I still couldn't make it through my Zico mini-bottle.

Even more recently, my friend Matt really wanted to try it (ignoring my testimonial). His reasoning? "It's supposed to be so good for you." So is church, but you don't see me choking that crap down either. 

Stick with water for hydration, and bananas for potassium. If do you happen to love the taste of Coconut Water ... by all means, pleeeeeease let me know why. Again, the TASTE, not what it "does" for you. Go on, tell me how "delicious" it is. 

DOMINO'S PIZZA

I realize that what I'm about to write may alienate some readers, as well as encourage some to make a relatively unhealthy dietary choice. This is a gamble I'm willing to take. 


Recently, Honeybee and I were at home, exhausted and starving, a combination that often leads to horrific choices ending with pints of Ben & Jerry's Red Velvet Cake Ice Cream. Anyway, after a couple of not-so-hot edible experiences with some other local pizza places, we decided to order from that beloved 90's delivery staple, Domino's. 

Hoping to "Avoid the Noid" (and risk being seen in public), we ordered online.

Wow. The entire online ordering experience with Domino's was a cheese-filled breeze. Excellent, actually. Easy to order, and their website enthusiastically detailed the process for us. At one point, the website even informed us that "Luigi" (not his real name) was "boxing" our pizza. It's that specific. 

The pizza itself was delicious, with ingredients that tasted as fresh as anything I'd tasted recently from other delivered endeavors. 

Log on, order up and bon appetit! ... I'm serious. Click For Domino's

"THE VIEW"

Dear Readers, 

You may have been wondering where I've been for the past few months. I've been all over the place, truly. The Poconos, New England, Europe ... but mostly, I've been working my tail off at my "job job." Not my first choice for summer fun, but such is life. 

Because I've been so busy with work, it forced me to make some hard decisions about the free time I was left with. I felt forced to hold a mirror to my eating, sleeping and exercise habits, and I realized that I'm an ice-creaming eating, sleep-deprived, fat ass. 

This self-inventory did not stop there though. I checked my DVR listings off and on during this time and was shocked at how many episodes of The View I was expected to catch up on. Could that much time have truly passed? But I dove in to a couple of episodes anyway ... and decided that I was giving up on "The View."

It should be said here that I used to L-O-V-E The View, from the Meredith Viera days onward. (Yes, including Rosie's time - like it or not - she's what took the show into a whole new direction with her passionate political views. I loved her.) The way the ladies would spar and discuss the political climate was often informative and exhilarating - except for Sherri Shepherd, who can barely keep her flash cards in order, let alone give commentary on them. 

The reason I'm giving up on the show is that it has become painfully clear that they are simply unable (or afraid) to give any type of real commentary on celebrity news. Whether it's Charlie Sheen, Tracy Morgan or Lindsay Lohan, you can almost predict the lame sound bites to come ...

Joy:  (Enter joke here that with will inexplicably loop in Sarah Palin.)

Sherrie:  "Do the kids know?" "Was his wife there?" "Did anyone see her do it?" (Do your research, please.)

Elizabeth:  "What do I tell MY KIDS about this?" (Yes, you poor thing. Sorry, I can never imagine her at a loss for words.)

Whoopi:  "Everyone makes mistakes." (Yes, but not all of them involve hookers, grand larceny, racial slurs and threats of violence.)

Barbara:  "What a tragedy for all involved." (In fairness, Barbara often is the most feisty - so I won't judge.) 

YAWN. I realize that The View relies on celebs as guests, so I'm confused as to why the show brings up these types of topics in the first place? They all walk such a rehearsed tight rope whenever celeb topics come up - it's mind-numbing to watch, as if they're "giving a pass" to celebrity behavior and/or condoning it. 

They should just stick with politics, economy, health and news of the day - sans celeb stories. Otherwise, all the safe responses suggest that out of that five-woman panel, there's not one true backbone.